No Revive: The Story of Hellhammer, Bowziee, & Grave!

No Revive: The Story of Hellhammer, Bowziee & Grave
Brought to you by Bowziee

Warning: Some of the material in this topic may be found offensive or down right retarded. All of the facts stated in this document are 100% true and have been researched heavily before being published on this website. All pictures below the headings are used for dramatic effect and are not to be taken too seriously. Please take the time to look at this if YOU or any of your loved ones have had a kill stolen by that jack-off Hellhammer.



A few years ago an illegal mexican named Grave decided to hop the border to the "U.S. & A", so he could play Gears of War 3.



One night Hellhammer, Bowziee, Grave & Crapgamer decided play some good ol' Gears of War 3.



Hellhammer was notoriously known for stealing kills. (Booooh!)



Whenever someone downed an enemy....



Hellhammer would take the kill for himself like a Generic Non American Description !



He would come up with all kinds of excuses for purposefully stealing kills.



SUCH AS...

"I was using a Mulcher!!!"



"I was team firing!!!"



OR SOMETHING SIMPLE SUCH AS...


Sigh. Anyway. This particular day, Hellhammer, Bowziee, Grave & Crapgamer were playing on Thrashball.



In the beginning of the match, Hellhammer ran across the map to one of Bowziee's downs...



And takes the kill for himself!



Shortly after Hellhammer was downed by some Locust at the feet of Bowziee and Grave!



So Bowziee and Grave took this opportunity to punish Hellhammer by not reviving him. Winning!



Hellhammer didn't respond kindly to this.



Hellhamer yelled on his headset, shouting things like...

"Crud YOU GRAVE YOU SPIC!!!"

"Crud GRAVE AND BOWZIEE!!!"

"I DON'T WANT TO PLAY WITH PEOPLE WHO DON'T WORK AS A TEAM!!!"

"THIS IS BULLSHIT YOU GUYS!!!"


It was obvious that Hellhammer couldn't take a dose of his own medicine. Kinda like Heath Ledger...



Hellhammer decided not to speak a word for a full hour.



Eventually things turned around after some StUfF talk. Time took its course (Estimated time: 1 hour) and Hellhammer overcame his rage. Maybe Hellhammer will stop stealing kills? Maybe he learned his lesson? Maybe Crapgamer is the next Bowziee? I doubt it... but maybe. The moral of the story: Taking something that's not yours is not acceptable and frowned upon.

Like FUSION AT A FRAT PARTY!

LMFAO! That was very well done sir!

I could have sworn this was in the barracks, I was freaking out thinking HH removed it. This is the best post ever! and I am the next Bowziee!

maybe cg is the next bowzie, i doubt it lmao that golden lololololol

POST OF THE YEAR

you sir win epic win

Haha. It was fun making this!

hey bowzie rmeber that one time when we didnt help hh up and he raged for an hour seems like it was yesterday

I know I remember, it was fun. Back when I had an Xbox 360